A healthy relationship needs consistency and equal effort from both parties. Most of the time how we speak rather than what needs to be conveyed makes a huge difference.
As romantic relationships aren’t easy to navigate, a YouTuber who specializes in all things dating and relationships highlights five habits that may be “ruining” your relationship, while suggesting healthy alternatives.
5 habits that are ‘ruining’ your relationship
The creator of The Personal Development School, Thais Gibson, has explained five “healthy alternatives” to common habits in a relationship that often cause differences and misunderstandings.
Stating your relationship needs
When you’re in a relationship, repetitive mistakes by your significant other can push you to the end of your tether. However, stating your needs negatively doesn’t do any good to either of you.
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The YouTuber suggests simply stating your need as a humble request rather than pointing it out for not being done. For example, you can say: “Could you please help with the dishes”, rather than: “You never do the dishes.”
How to react when your need isn’t met
Just because you put your need across to your partner doesn’t mean it would be fulfilled or worse, meets your expectations. But, being critical of it will only make things worse.
Thais suggests constructive criticism that wouldn’t hurt your partner, as well as to have your needs met without stirring an argument over a badly done task.
You can’t be a mind reader
You may have seen reels and shorts on social media depicting the next common habit that often breaks relationships – when one partner expects the other to read their mind.
Not being vocal about your feelings and emotions will not just cause a void between you and your partner, but also leave you disappointed with unreasonable expectations.
Communication is key to a healthy relationship and an open conversation is better than resolving a fight that stems from misunderstanding due to the lack of it.
‘Dishonesty in a relationship is a killer’
Whether you’re dishonest because of your fears and insecurities or to get away from a certain situation, involving lies in your relationship can cause irreversible damage.
Thais says a series of lies over time will definitely impact your partner’s impression of you and result in further friction in the dynamic you share.
Don’t shove things under the rug
Issues left unresolved or emotions that aren’t addressed are among the most common and preventable issues in a relationship.
The resentment only builds up when a couple fails to work through the problems and chooses to ignore them. This means you don’t have to necessarily agree with your partner, but you can still acknowledge their perspective for conflict resolution.
Thais Sibson is a best-selling author, counselor, speaker, and leader in the personal development field. She holds a Ph.D and is certified in Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, NLP, Somatic Processing, and Trauma Work.
She is the founder of the YouTube channel The Personal Development School, which features videos and courses for personal development, growth, and relationships.
