By Kaisar Andrabi
DELHI – On December 13, the Maharashtra government announced that it will set up a panel, headed by the state's Women and Child Development Minister, to track inter-caste and interfaith marriages in the state. The aim of the 13-member panel named the 'Intercaste/ Interfaith Marriage-Family Coordination Committee (state level)' is reportedly to provide a platform for women in inter-caste and inter-faith marriages to communicate with their estranged families. This was done in light of Shraddha Walker's murder in Delhi allegedly by her live-in partner Aftab Poonawalla.
Just days later, on December 15, the state government amended its resolution and said that the task of the committee will now be limited to interfaith marriages only,The Indian Express reported.
The announcement drew criticism from women's organisations, activists and political analysts, who called it a "dangerous move." BOOM spoke to couples in interfaith marriages to understand what this decision means for them.
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Would such a panel actually help?
For 29-year-old Anjali* the news of the panel, which will gather information on interfaith marriages through registrar offices and stamp duty, is "worrying and scary." She is one of the hundreds of interfaith couples who have faced harassment from their families because of their choice to marry outside their religion.
Anjali met Azhar* in college and got married in 2019 after going through several hurdles. "I had told my mother about Azhar and she never expressed any objection to our friendship. But when I told her that we wanted to marry, the family started raising objections," Anjali told BOOM.
The couple faced physical and mental harassment and social ostracization backed by Anjali's family. "They locked me in my room for days and put Azhar in jail for two days with the help of a relative who was an employee in the police department. My relatives tried to kill Azhar. He was badly injured and almost lost vision in his right eye after the attack," she said.
Azhar was put in the police lockup for two days without an FIR being registered. To escape Anjali's family the couple eloped with the help of Azhar's family, who were supportive of the relationship. They got married in Pune, where they lived for the next two years.
However, it was difficult for Anjali to overcome the trauma of the harassment she faced. "For months, I was scared of going out with Azhar or alone. I left my job and could not muster up the courage to go out and live freely. The thought of getting traced by my family was following like a shadow," Anjali said.
Two months ago, the couple moved to Navi Mumbai because of Azhar's job. The Indian Express reported that the panel will find the addresses of estranged families like Anjali's and get in touch with the parents, reportedly for reconciliation.
Anjali believes that the reconciliation plan is not intended to benefit interfaith couples whose families are opposed to their marriage. "The reason is not for reconciliation or counselling, it is a trap for all those women who had made a choice to marry Muslims," she said.
The panel is reportedly supposed to provide protection and support to women who are not in contact with their families.
Speaking to BOOM, Audrey D'Mello, program director of Majlis — a team of women lawyers and social workers who work for the protection and promotion of women and children's rights — called this panel a new way to harass people who are in interfaith marriages.
D'Mello, who herself is in an interfaith marriage, questioned the intention of the panel. "Why would I have my record anywhere? Why should my details be with them? I feel it is dangerous and how will it be used? And why are they concerned about women who are in such marriages, if they (the government) is concerned about women, they should address the violence perpetrated by spouses or families in general," she said.
She said the argument of making such a panel by citing the Shraddha Walker case was "irrational". "Shraddha's case was not of a married couple. That is a case of violence and why they are not addressing the violence. There are scores of cases where women have come up with their accounts of violence they face in normal marriages, what are police and law doing about such cases?" she asked.
D'Mello pointed out that rather than addressing the issue of violence, the government was making it look like interfaith/caste marriages can take an ugly turn. "The problem is something and the solution is not matching the problem. It seems the solution has some other agenda," she said.
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Attack on the right to choice
The panel will not only look at registered marriages but also unregistered ones that were conducted in places of worship. It will also collect information on couples who eloped to get married. Thirty-six-year-old Tabasum said this was likely to invite more trouble for couples who do not wish to be in touch with their hostile families.
"After six years of my marriage with a Muslim boy, I tried to contact my family last year through a distant relative, after I heard from her that my mother was not keeping well. But the response was humiliating" she said.
The family, even after six years of their marriage, was not ready to accept her choice. "I went to see her at the hospital with my husband and daughter, they behaved terribly and abused my husband and daughter," Tabasum told BOOM.
She said it was not easy to convince families, build new communication channels or resolve rifts with them when they are opposed to the idea of interfaith marriages.
"How is that guaranteed that even after a woman wishes to connect with the family, they will accept her and not create new problems later?" she asked. "The panel or the committee would help in communicating not in protecting the couple. Anything can happen to us. Who is responsible if my family is attacked again?" she said.
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How interfaith marriages become public debate
Anjali's and Tabasum's cases aren't unique. Between 2017 and 2018, the case of Hadiya and Shafin Jehan, a couple from Kerala, had become a matter of public debate, prompting prime-time TV talk shows and discussions on social media.
Hadiya, previously named Akhila, had converted to Islam and later married Shafin. This was opposed by her family as forced conversion, and her father moved the Kerala High Court, which in turn annulled her marriage. In 2018, the Supreme Court stayed the high court order and allowed Hadiya to go back to her husband after she said she wanted to live with him.
Speaking to BOOM, Delhi University professor and socio-political analyst Apoorvanand said that the idea of making this panel was to "defame inter-caste and interfaith marriages".
"Union between two persons or marriage is entirely a personal matter. It should not be the concern of the state to whom one is going to marry. But we have seen in India that there are organisations which try to interfere and influence the decision of couples. And couples suffer because of this, especially women," he explained.
He said by such interference, a personal choice becomes a public matter. He criticised the decision and said through such policies, the government was normalising interference in people's personal lives.
He pointed out there are several incidents of violence perpetrated against women in endogenous marriages that remain unaddressed. "If we look at the statistics on murders or death of married women in India – the figures are worrying. On average, twenty women die or are killed in dowry cases every day in India. And they are in touch with their families. This excuse of the Poonawala case and arguments like interfaith women should be put in touch with their families is a trap and bogus," Apoorvanand said.
He said this would also put couples under surveillance and could trigger vigilantism. "The vigilante groups keep chasing them and attack them, murder them. Such couples are being chased, trapped and brought back to court and being pushed into legal battles," he said.
Can such a panel create fear?
Samar Halarnkar, a senior editor and co-founder of India Love Project —which celebrates inter-faith, inter-caste love and marriages — believes this policy is unlikely to stop people from different faiths and castes to fall in love with each other but would definitely make things more difficult for them.
"Whether you like it or not, young people are studying together, working together, and meeting each other. So young people falling in love across caste and faith is bound to happen. I don't think it can be stopped, despite the best efforts of fundamentalists and others," he said.
Halarnkar said that even in announcing something like this, the government is completely disregarding the agency of women and that a move like this interferes with the personal choices of women.
"They are giving legitimacy to it by saying that we are concerned about women who have lost touch with their own families. However more than 90% of marriages in India are of the same faith, same caste, and in numerous such marriages, we have seen unspeakable cruelties heaped on women," Halarnkar explains. "If the government was sincere that is what they would focus on."
* Anjali and Azhar's names have been changed to protect their identities.
